Inspiration

I've been kind of in a "funk" lately with blogging. I mean there's nothing really going on to blog about, except drama and I'd rather try to forget about that for awhile.

Please stay tuned for the regular scheduled programming......

Surprise

LOL. Ok, this IS my all time favorite!!

Evolution of Dance

Ok. One more. LOL

Hahaha

Ok.... I'm havin a "YouTube" night. I LOOOOOOVE this one!

Check this out.....

The only time I'd enjoy being in prison.... to watch this!!!

The Family Cometh

Family is here. I thought I would be nervous... well, I was at first but they are so nice and I got comfortable in no time. Of course I haven't really gotten to know them yet. They just got in a few hours ago and I mostly have just been able to sit and listen to stories, but it's been enjoyable. Grandma is so cute!!! She just smiled and kissed me on the cheek as soon as she came in! God I miss female interaction! Family, I mean. I'm usually surrounded by men so the sight of female family gets me excited! Girl talk!!! LOL

Tommorrow evening I'm going to make dinner. A bit nervous about that and hoping that they aren't as picky as Joel. He says that they'll love my deer steak so I'm holding him to that. Deer steaks, chicken breast marinated in Itailian dressing and baked, fried potatoes, green beans. That oughta show 'em us "southerners" know how to cook up a meal.

I think Sunday we'll drive to Valley Falls and show them where we got married. It's not a far drive and this weekend is actually the Blackberry Festival so we may be able to head over there and look around a bit. It's their call.

More updates later

My Biggest Fear

I recently read this article in the news....... it sickens me to even see this man alive, let alone walk away in cuffs. That isn't justice.......

Respiratory therapist Wayne Albert Bleyle was in New York state on a wintry day when investigators called him about allegations he had molested patients too sick to defend themselves.

When they asked how many children he molested, investigators said, he looked out his window and asked, "How many snowflakes are there out there?"

On Wednesday, Bleyle didn't turn to look as a succession of parents and family members of victims spoke at his sentencing hearing. Some wept; others shook with anger.

As part of a plea deal, Bleyle, 56, was sentenced to 45 years and eight months in prison for molesting five of his young, disabled patients and for taking pornographic photographs of others. Prosecutors said he targeted those who were comatose, brain-damaged or too disabled to talk.

"You have violated the trust of your patients, you have violated the trust of your employer, and you have inflicted indescribable anguish on your victims and their families," Superior Court Judge Kenneth K. So told Bleyle.

Bleyle, who told investigators he molested as many as half the children he treated in his ten years working in the convalescent ward at Rady Children's Hospital in San Diego, stared straight ahead or cast his eyes down at the table in front of him as victims' relatives spoke.

"I just want you to know it doesn't matter what you say or how many years you spend in jail - it's not going to be enough," Lillian Godfrey, whose daughter is now dead, told Bleyle. "I don't think you have a soul. You're just an empty human shell."

Prosecutors said the extent of Bleyle's molestation will never be known because he targeted patients who were comatose, brain-damaged or too disabled to speak.

He was arrested last year after investigators tracing pornography through the Internet found tens of thousands of pornographic images on his computer, including photographs he took of himself abusing his patients.

He allegedly confessed to investigators in March 2006 when they reached him by phone in New York state, where he was visiting relatives. When he was arrested, he was living in a trailer in a casino parking lot because his wife had kicked him out of the house.

Bleyle worked at the renowned Rady hospital for 25 years, the last 10 at the convalescent home, where the most disabled patients live. The 59-bed convalescent hospital treated 176 patients during Bleyle's 10 years working there.

"He wishes to apologize to all the victims and their families," said his attorney, Casey Donovan, who noted that Bleyle himself had been sexually abused as a boy. "He knows he can never make amends for what he has done."

Investigators identified just four of Bleyle's victims: three girls and a boy who were all younger than 14 when the molestations took place. Two of the children have since died. Investigators were never able to put a name to one of the victims, a 2-year-old girl found in pictures.

Janice Frost, whose 10-year-old daughter died in June 2006, three months after investigators discovered her image on Bleyle's home computer, called it a "parent's worst nightmare." Frost said her daughter was under Bleyle's care from the time she entered the long-term facility as a 10-day-old newborn suffering a brain condition. "During her dying moments, I told her I would see this through," Frost said outside the courtroom, as she clutched one of her three older daughters.

Bleyle faced up to 165 years if he had been convicted on all counts in a jury trial. Prosecutors said they made a deal in part because they were anxious to spare one of Bleyle's victims, a teenage girl who claimed Bleyle inappropriately touched her buttocks while she recovered from a stroke, the strain of testifying before a jury.

Bleyle's arrest prompted the hospital to ban cell phones in patient treatment areas, including rooms, and require doors and curtains around patients be left open most of the time, said hospital spokesman Ben Metcalf.

In court, Pandora Johnson said she had asked her son, who cannot speak because of a breathing device in his throat, whether he had been abused. "He didn't give his usual yes or no sign. He just looked afraid," Johnson said. "And when I said, 'Wayne will never do this to you again,' he gave me a big smile. That smile broke my heart."

That Sigh of Relief

Well the test is done and over with.... I passed after a grouling 3 hour call test. Two tests down and now waiting on reference check and background check, other than that looks like the only other obstacle is the interview. The testing administrator advised me that they have interviews booked for the entire month of August, which means it looks like my interview wouldn't be until September. That sucks, really sucks. I was stoked about passing the test, but quickly brought down by finding out that I may have to wait 2 months for the interview. Meanwhile I've pretty much decided that I'll have to keep looking, take whatever comes along and then see how it turns out.

Needless to say the next week or so I'll be shipping out more resumes. Job hunting sucks.

Testing, Testing 1 2 3

Ok, I'm freaking out and I need something to do to occupy my time.... thus, the blog entry.

I go for my second test in 2 hours and I'm finding that my stomach is doing tumblesaults. I haven't wanted anything like this for a long time, well since I met my husband online and was waiting for him to move to West Virginia. Ahhh, the memories.

So far, I've defeated Rome (online game I've been playing), folded 3 baskets of laundry (while watching the Price Is Right), put away groceries, done 3 loads of laundry and barely got down a cup of coffee.

We did get a call from Joel's dad last night advising us that he would be in next weekend, not this weekend. That gives me a bit more time to get things here at the home front situated for their visit. It's also good because my family (2 aunts, my cousin and her baby) is coming in this weekend. I was a bit concerned how I would manage to visit with everyone in just one weekend. It's bad in another sense because Joel is scheduled to work that Saturday, but he's going to talk to his boss and see if something can be worked out. I hope so, I have no clue how I would manage to entertain people I don't know much about. I'm sure I'd come up with something, but I would want it to be something they would enjoy doing. We'll see.

Ok.... times a tickin, I'm off to shower and test. ACK!!!! I'm scared!!!

Staying Busy

Cleaning is tough. I would NEVER want to do it for a living! I simply cannot wait to get back to work.

Joel's family is coming for their visit this weekend. I'm nervous. They'll be in Friday night and from my understanding staying through Sunday. Not only are they coming in, but my family from North Caroling and Ohio are coming as well. Don't know how I'm going to manage that. Too many people to visit in a very short time. Wish our house was big enough to have them all over, but I just can't see how that would be possible. If our back area was cleaned up a bit we could probably manage a nice cookout, but finding out we have family from both sides coming in the same weekend at the last moments notice simply will not make that possible.

I'm trying to get the house organized and even though I've gotten a lot accomplished there just doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. Of course I could probably be doing something more productive then blogging right now, but hey... everyone needs a break! I couldn't do much this morning because I had to run a few errands and had an interview today. Tomorrow is another day that I won't be able to accomplish much. I take my 2nd test for Verizon. THAT, I'm really nervous about. The interview went well today, perhaps too well. It's a good job, a secretary for the community career center. Contract job from August 2007 to July of 2008 with the possibility of becoming full time. The only negative issues are the hours. I'd be working from 3pm-9pm and I just can't see how that would be possible with Faith. I just hope that I find out about Verizon soon, before possibly hearing back from the career center. I don't want to turn anything down that would benefit this family. The career center job (because it's contract) doesn't offer benefits, so that's another negative. But it does pay well, very well for this area. Joel went for his interview yesterday at the college. He says it seemed to go very well, but he's not getting his hopes too high (he doesn't want to get bummed if he doesn't get a call back). They did mention the possibility of him being able to take classes while working to earn his degree. THAT would be awesome!! I would so love for him to achieve that. You'd think with everything he knows that he had a degree, but he doesn't. That would just be the icing on the cake.

I'll update later on about the job search and about the family visit.

My Next Tattoo

Well I have a "fixin". I need another tattoo. Thought long and hard about this one. The one I have was on a whim. It's on the back of my neck/upper back. I knew I wanted a sun/moon tat but wasn't sure exactly the specific design. This is how it turned out.

Not too bad. This next one will "mean" something. Since the blog speaks of how my life has taken such a turn over the past 1 1/2 yrs then I've decided on a butterfly hatching from the caccoon. Here's the picture we found:

Only Joel is going to modify it a bit, he's going to draw it up and I'll take that in for them to go by. Not only will his drawing be on me, but I'm also going to have names incorporated in with the tattoo. I'm going to have my Mom's name in the body of the butterfly, Faith's name on one wing and Joel's name on the other. This signifies that these are the people in my life that have made me who I am today.... from caterpillar to butterfly. It will be posted as soon as it's complete. I'm much more excited about this one!

Days of Dull

I miss working. Never thought I'd think that, but I do. I'll now be unemployed almost a month. It's killing me. The house looks real nice and the clothes seem to be getting laundered more efficiently, but I miss work.

I'm counting on July 25th. I take the second testing for Verizon. I will be absolutely crushed if I don't pass that test. I've had a few interviews, but I'm really holding out for Verizon. I'd hate to take a job and be there less than a month to take a better job. It's getting stressful financially to think about "what if". What if I don't get on there, then what? Ugh, it's driving me crazy already!!! The plus side to not working is the fact that I can start immediately. That has to be good, right?

Other than that my day is filled with laundry, dishes, dusting, vacuuming...... OH LORD!!! I'm officially a "housewife". Next thing I know, I'll be exchanging recipes with the women's auxiliary!

I've got to get this job. I NEED this job.

My Trip to the Lawyer

An update on the latest events.

We were finally able to obtain the name of a lawyer who handles cases of special needs children. Unfortunately not local, but within the state. Today we drove to Charleston (about a 2 hr drive) to talk to him. The plus of this is that he is within the state, which means he's very familiar with the special education laws.

We provided him with school records (that of which we were charged $62) and medical records from Faith's PCP and Neurologist. We were in his office for approximately 2 hrs explaining the circumstances and issues. He took notes and told us that he needed to review the paperwork and would get back to us. He asked several questions and seemed to "gasp" at some of the statements we repeated that have been made by staff and the BOE.

He asked if we had come to the consultation as a "just in case we need him" or if we were asking him to file the complaints on the board to the state. I advised him that we would handle the complaints alone, that we had an advocate assisting us with those. I advised him that I wanted to proceed in full force, taking the Board of Education to court and demanding that Faith receive an aide.

Please keep us in prayers as we await his response.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Now that our Poker Run has come to an end (till next year, that is) things have settled down a bit. Still lots of stuff going on but at least the event was a success and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves; to us, the most important thing was getting the message out but was so awesome to see everyone have so much fun!

Like I said, lots has happened. Friday was my last day at the nursing home. I resigned. They advised me that I would take on another role/duty as "HR Assistant", but yet no pay raise to go with these extra duties. Congrats HR Director.... "here's your sign". Ya just can't throw a bunch more work on a person, not give them a pay increase and expect them to stick around for more torture. Well, at least I didn't. I'm a good, hard, dependable worker and how dare they make me feel any differently, in the meantime the HR Director gets double my salary yet I'm doing 25% of her job. Eh. I don't think so. My husband was wonderful and supported me through the entire thing, actually if it had been up to him he would have cheered me to walk out without a notice, but walking out with a notice was a leap enough for me. I've worked since I was 15 yrs old and have only held 4 jobs with 2 yrs being my shortest term. Heartland has officially broken this record. That bothers me.... alot. But deep down I know that I'm better than this and it seems like because of the way things are run at the facility, job security wasn't one thing I would have been 100% sure of. Things happen for a reason (wise words from my husband). Where one door closes, another opens (wise words from my MoM).

I did test for Verizon this morning and PASSED!!!! Yippee!!!! I always swore I'd never do call center work again, but after doing it for so long and being away from it a year; well walking into that call center this morning felt like "home". It's what I know and what I know I do well. I believe that I excel at any job, however when you do something for that long then you tend to favor familiarity. My next testing is scheduled for July 25. So, I will take this break and get things on the homefront straightened around and sorted.

Joel found out last week that his Dad and Grandmother will be paying a visit within the next 2 or 3 weeks. That's exciting! I'm excited that Joel will be able to spend some time with his Dad and Grandmother; I, on the other hand, am a nervous wreck. Not so much about Grandma (fellow females in a situation like this tend to bond no matter what), but Dad? Well, he's a different story. I've talked to him before and he's really enjoyable but for some strange reason, I'm a ball of nerves. I just hope they like me and don't ask "What in the world does Joel see in her???" I don't know them that well, I know they wouldn't think that; but you know... I'm still scared.

I'll try to update more often now that things have settled a bit. The photos are on our website of the Poker Run, please take the time to visit when you can!

http://www.crusadeforfaith.org/events.cfm

Clean Saturday

Well today is "clean" day. I've made it my mission to get my house clean. Not "straightened"; clean. I've got clean laundry all over our bedroom as well as Faith's room. I'm ashamed actually. Seems whenever we need clean clothes we have to fish through baskets and such to get an outfit. Today those will get hung and folded and put away.

This is actually the first weekend my husband has had to work. It sucks. Thank God I have Faith here today, I'd be beside myself. I hate a quiet house. I mean quiet as in nobody stirring around.

Needless to say, so far I've been able to keep myself busy. Our bedroom is almost done and next I'm hitting the computer room. That won't take long, then the bathroom; again not long. Kitchen on the other hand, well the only real thing that needs done in there are the floors. Faith's room - torture. We haven't even gotten that straightened around from the move. Her clothes also all over the place; clean, but all over the place. Dining Room and Living Room is gonna be a breeze, but I have to save that for last as "Queen Bee" is in watching TV. I dare not to interrupt when Elmo is playing.

So hopefully, even though my husband isn't here to share my Saturday I'll be able to get something accomplished. Then this evening nothing but a little R&R; after yesterday's emotional roller coaster I'm not even going out of the house. If I stay within my safe place then there's nothing that can cross my path; aside from the occasional dust bunny.

Latest Updates

I've been so pre-occupied with things that have been going on with Friday, I've not had the oppurtunity to update my blog. Will try to do that more often though.

For some interesting reading, you may refer to my daughter's blog at:

http://sweetfaith98.blogspot.com/

Calling, Mailing, Hanging....$$$$$

Wow. I didn't realize how much work it is to try to raise money for a good cause. You'd think that it would be almost effortless, but people are so greedy.

The last post was a day I had received two calls in one day.... that's been it; period. No other sponsors, calls, or donations. No wait, I take that back. A local motorcycle shop sent us $25. While that's all good, it's kind of disappointing. We were hoping that the local motorcycle shops would really reach out and donate items; such as helmets, riding gloves, gift cards.... you know? So far the most generous offer we've gotten was the t-shirt deal. We ended up increasing the registration cost because we're having to go to such extreme measures to get sponsors. We paid $45 to run an ad in the local newspaper.... for one day, yes (1) day. Now that's just ridiculous. Next we're going to mail out a bunch of sponsor forms to local businesses to see if that will generate any reaction. With the cost of stamps, right now we're up to $60 just in postage. Then to have the copies made.... we've probably spent at least $75 in copies.

I'm loosing faith in the community I live. We're not asking for much; just help us get this thing off the ground so the rights for these kids will get noticed. I don't think that's too much to ask.

Our Crusade

Wow. So much has happened in just the little bit of time I haven't posted. So much to tell!

We are getting great response from the community so far, I mean this isn't even a week old yet and we've already got 4 sponsors!!! There are actually two of our sponsors who are quite huge in this area, which is really great. We also have a sponsor who will be providing t-shirts for our run. Wow! That is amazing!!!

We've also been "legalized"; meaning that the IRS issued us an EIN number which makes us not breaking any laws. Because of this, we were able to open a checking account just for "Crusade for Faith". That's pretty awesome. This means we can now officially accept donations and bank them for when they are needed. Hopefully this Poker Run event will be the first of many and we've even discussed the possibility of having a car show sometime in September. I'm not concerned about bikers not showing, when it comes to raising money for kids they really pull through no matter what.

My friend Cacie and her boyfriend Punk have been awesome too!!! Her and I exchange ideas practically all throughout the day while we're at work (text messages... my cell phone bill is gonna rocket but it's so worth it). We have lots of folks who have volunteered to make a covered dish for our ending destination. We have 2 for sure stops lined up and 1 potential stop. I'd like to get 2 more stops for them. We desperately need contributions for raffles and door prizes though, hopefully with our next mailing that will start rolling in.

This is exciting! And for under a week I think that we've achieved well. I will be updating this often and again ..... please check out the beautiful website my husband built at:
www.CrusadeforFaith.org

Some Mother's Earn God's Greatest Gift.

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, the instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son: patron saint, Matthew.
"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter, patron saint, Cecelia.
Rudledge, Carrie; twins; patron saint...give her Gerard. He's use to profanity."
Finally, he passes a name to give an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God.
"Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" the angel asks.
"I dont want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it.
"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world. She has to make it live in her world and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I dont think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods, "If she cant separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, there is a woman who, I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a "spoken word." She will never consider a "step" ordinary. When her child says "Momma" for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it!
"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see -- ignorance, cruelty, prejudice -- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every day of her life because she is doing my work."